I decided to post an email string that occurred today. I find that I don't post as much these days on grieving. That is for a number of reasons. However, I wanted to post some kind words that came from a friend and my response to her. I'm doing so because I am aware of a number of friends around me who are walking through their own trials. And I think the following words so adequately give testimony to the kindness or our Lord, His active involvement into every detail of our hard times, our thoughts, and our emotions and His commitment and promise to uphold us and see us through.
Let me tell you, I needed this reminder! I have felt lonely, inadequate as a mom, wife, homemaker, and weary the past number of days. I've been missing Alivia and have been more aware of circumstances than I have of who God is and how great He is, not just to save my soul, but to uphold my soul all the days of my life. This email was a reminder of God's specific care for me.
So, I pray for all those of you whose days are characterized by hardship right now. May the following words remind you of how acquainted the Lord is with us, how He can sympathize with our sufferings and how much He knows and and will care for us through them...
And, Cara, once again...THANKS! I'm in tears again as I read your kind words.
Hi, Heather!
Just wanted to say hi and let you know that you've been fresh on my heart the last couple of days. I don't have any big word or even a verse to share, but I think of and pray for you often, love reading your blog and seeing those beautiful little girls, and continue to remember your Alivia with gratefulness and tears. I only got to meet her once, so in my mind's eye she is always that tiny pink and white bundle with a perfect, baby face, wrapped in a blanket and snuggled sleeping on your shoulder. I look forward to meeting her again in Heaven some day, where she will be a veteran worshiper at the Throne. How much I will have to learn from her then!
Much love,
Cara
Cara,
*Tears.* Thanks so much, my friend! Well you have been sensitive to the Spirit and for that I'm so grateful. The past few days have been particularly hard for me and as I sit here I am once again aware and reminded of how the Lord knows and He has and is providing for my every need. Your email could not have been more timely or more meaningful, Cara. Life has been particularly challenging with meeting the needs of 3 little ones (as you very well know :), I've been weary, exhausted and very emotional and weepy (I think my hormones have been a little wild the past few days). On top of that I have just been particularly missing our little one no longer here, wondering what she would look like toddling around and what our family would be like with her. It's an interesting and hard dynamic, knowing that if she were here, Addie would not be, so in the Lord's sovereignty I rest. Also, sleep has been restless for me the last few nights, adding to my drama of emotion. And Dave left this morning for a business trip this week.
I just say all that to encourage and thank you, Cara. The Lord could have put me on your heart, you prayed, and then stopped there. But the fact that you would take the time (which is precious, I KNOW) to sit and write to let me know, is...well, means so much, dear friend. The Lord used it to strengthen my weak and weary soul and I will come back to it this week, I'm sure, to read and be refreshed.
Thanks, as well, for continuing to remember Alivia and us, in general. I was just thinking last night how losing her has taken so much out of us and has rocked our world in ways that probably only the Lord knows about. And we still have not recovered...I am learning it takes so much time and our hearts will never be the same until heaven. Once again, I say that to communicate how much the Lord has used your care!
I continue to be so grateful for you, Cara!
Love,
Heather
